When I told my sister-in-law about the good baby news, she said “Oh, good, now you can sleep, right!” Ha! That’s what she thinks. Now I need to worry about hydrocephalus and discordant growth and preterm labor and shortening cervix and…I could go on and on. But I am really trying to not worry and to enjoy what might only be my only pregnancy. I am most likely about halfway through and it hasn’t exactly been a picnic so far. But I really want to start to feel that excitement, which requires a lot of faith-building on my part, and requires me to embrace the feeling that everything is going to be okay.
I had a hard time getting to sleep last night because someone was keeping me up. I’m not going to name names (Baby A) but this someone was kicking me on and off in the lower abdominal area for about a half hour. Now these kicks are by no means powerful; in fact they are barely noticeable. And I am not even certain that it is kicking. But it is that little popping sensation again, in the same area, coming in random intervals. It could just be gas or something, but I was just so amazed that it might be kicking. That fact that I have two little lives in me is really starting to sink in. Two little girls; our daughters. And that kept me awake and full of wonder for a while. And then I worried if it was possible to kick a cervix open.
I also tried to engage Nicole in bedtime conversation, a practice she hates, as she takes her sleep very seriously, which is understandable—in her defense—since she is the one who has to get up at the crack of dawn and go to work. But I saw on another blog (I need to learn how to create live links…anyone?) that this Photo Friday theme is “What makes your body unique?” I decided that this is a good question for Nicole. At night, right before she goes to sleep. Which she takes very seriously.
Me: What do you think is my most unique body part?
Nicole: What?
Me: My most unique body part?
Nicole: I don’t know. It’s bedtime.
Me: Can’t you think of something?
Nicole: All of your body parts are unique. Everyone’s parts are unique. [with a touch of annoyance] Why?
Me: [I explain Photo Friday]
Nicole: I don’t know [she starts to laugh] . Maybe your arm hair, since it grew to an inch and half long during this pregnancy. [hysterical laughing.]
Not what I was thinking! And here I thought she would say something romantic like “Your stomach, because it holds my two children!” Or “Your beautiful _____.” Or “How could I possibly pick just one unique part of you?” But she is right: My arm hair grew and grew and I measured it at 1.5 inches long. Which is very long indeed. I finally cut it down with scissors, but not before contemplating braiding it, beading it, making dreads, etc.
Today I hit a milestone. I finally made it down to Pinkberry Yogurt (that’s not the milestone), and the Yogurt man behind the counter made some comment like “A woman in your condition shouldn’t be doing that.” (We were discussing gyms, for some small-talk reason.) This was the first time that someone I didn’t know acknowledged my pregnancy. Which means I am visibly pregnant, and not just chunky-looking. At 19 weeks and 3 days, someone sees me as pregnant; a complete stranger. In my winter coat, no less. It felt really good, and reminded me once again how lucky I am. After all that we went through, after feeling so hopeless and complete devoid of any faith, here I am, pregnant with two babies and looking like it.
Nine more sleeps till my next Level II Ultrasound.
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4 comments:
I hope you got the book I recommended. "When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets, Or Quads" by Dr. Barbara Luke. It will help answer some of the questions you will have throughout this pregnancy. Twin pregnancies are far from normal, and NOTHING like a singleton pregnancy....(I've had both and can speak from some experience)
Just wait until you are 6 months pregnant and everyone thinks you're ready to pop at any moment :)
You are going to get SO BIG !:)
And seriously... the most important question: How was Pinkberry Yogurt? Did it exceed your expectations - was it everything you thought it would be?? :)
There are so many ways we are similar. Today you highlighted
- that I will undoubtedly eventually worry about having my cervix kicked open
- that I have a bad tendency to want to talk to Wes when he wants to be asleep
- that I have long arm hair. Haven't been paying attention to any pg-related growth but will now.
I am happy for you.
Oh, and every time someone starts asking about Pinkberry on Urb*nb*by, I reply, "Jennifer?" because I am so sure that we've finally run into each other on there. Heh.
Yay for visible pregnancy recognition! It feels good doesn't it?
I know that you've had a lot of reasons to worry throughout your pregnancy, which I haven't, but I found that the combination of having the level II ultrasound and feeling the baby kick more and more regularly really helped to reassure me that all was well, and enabled me to start feeling much safer and more secure about everything going OK.
Oh, and I can't remember if I said this before, but I never felt any of the baby movements as the "flutterings" that many people (and most books) seem to describe. Much more like pops than flutterings. In fact, what it actually felt like to me was that the baby had a miniature plumber's vacuum suction thing (you know, the ones you use to unblock a sink), and was using that on the inside of my stomach!
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